How to Find
Love at the Movies
If you are a
princess best to take the day off
dress down, and find your true love among
the poor but noble street hustlers.
If you are a hooker,
best to wait at a bus stop
for a millionaire with no driving skills and a
weakness for damaged women.
If you are gay, give
up if you were born before
1980, you will have many good friends, dispense
much wisdom, and die alone.
If you are a family
pet, and your family leaves you
with the trusted aunt while they vacation, you will
travel far, but find much love at home
If you are a demon
hunter, vampire slayer or
otherwise underemployed, you will find true love
with one who carries the dark mark.
If you are most
comfortable alone in the dark of
a movie palace, you will find love everyday, all
you need to do is look up.